Still Here

I’m still here – finding my way through each day.  My dear, little mother has made progress in many ways but there are quite a few things that have made her care very different than we first thought.  I have hired a daytime caregiver so I can have some time to keep body and soul together.  Much of my time is spent managing life and business for her.  My sweetheart is in southern Mexico on a two-week missions trip that was planned long before my dear mother fell and broke her pelvic bone.  He will return home Saturday evening.  I’m not counting the hours.  Yet!  Just counting the days and looking forward to having him home again.

I am staying with my dear mother every night.  I ‘negotiated’ with her.  She hasn’t wanted a dog in her house before so I told her in order for me to stay nights with her, Joey, my little dog, had to be there, too.  After dinner each night I go home and get him.  The first evening he was there it was all new to him.  He had to sniff and snoop and check out every single nook and cranny.  She asked, ‘Will he break anything?’  ‘Only if it’s edible,’ I said, ‘then he will break it to pieces and eat it till it’s gone!’  He dearly loves her but he knows something isn’t the same as before.  When I open the door to let him into her home, he races to her side.  He sits in front of her walker and watches her.  Now that her home feels like home to him, he makes himself comfortable and relaxes. 

There are big decisions and changes ahead.  My sweetheart asked me not to make any big changes while he was away, unless they had to be made right away.  Just keep things working for her.  And for me.  Then, next week, he and I will begin to put things in place for the changes that must be made. I have sought much counsel and the changes that need to happen are obvious.  I feel such peace with the direction we will take.  Thank you for your prayers, your love and support and your kind comments and emails.  They mean so much to me. 

Today I read something that touched my heart and gave me strength.  It’s true.  So true.
 
‘As you care for your elderly mother or father, you may be the very hands of Christ taking care of them. And as you care for them, you may be surprised to discover that God does just the reverse: uses them to bless you as well, and teach you something more of Him. When this happens, you will know you’re finding God while caring for aging parents.’  (from findinggoddaily.com)

I am finding Him in new ways.  Every day.